Cluttered Thoughts

These are just random thoughts I’ve collected on my Google Keep App and also kind of an update. So yea.

// Things have been pretty tough lately. I’m trying to stay positive and not dwell on all the negativities but, it’s too hard. Sometimes you’ve just reached a point where everything is too overwhelming. All these problems and conflicts continuously pile up until you can’t take it anymore and you eventually just stop caring about everything. It’s saddening how things are turning out. Life really does get harder as we get older. I hope things will change for the better anytime soon.

// Some people are just plain rude. Does it hurt to be a little kinder? I hope people are more considerate of other people’s feelings. Yes, you may be going through some hard times but it doesn’t give you the right to be mean to someone. We all have our own battles to fight. We are all hurting. We are all scarred. And some of us are barely hanging on, so please be kind. It’s free.

// As we grow older, I’ve realized that it’s possible for us to dislike someone who had been once close to us. How life changed them and turned their personality into something worse. How the years of knowing each other now will be for naught but just mere memories. It’s crazy how life works, really. Sometimes, disconnecting and letting them go will do you good.

// Every parent should know that their kids are not their retirement plans.

// My Psoriasis is getting worse. I don’t think I’m that stressed. Maybe it’s my unhealthy way of living? Maybe it’s the weather? Maybe it just wants to be back every year to make everything hard for me?

// Our internet connection has been really shitty this month. It has been affecting my work. I don’t even want to go to my usual cafe and buy an expensive coffee in exchange for their free wi-fi that will expire every two hours, then I’ll have to buy another drink or food again just to get another two-hour access. What a waste of money! The internet in the Philippines really is fucked up.

// I’ve never been into fashion and I have disliked shopping for as long as I can remember. The only place where you can really see me enjoy and take my time is in a bookstore, but last week Asis and I did some shopping. I bought 6 t-shirts and most of them are plain ones. It has been years since I last bought some nice clothes. I can now stop myself from borrowing Asis’ clothes.

// My Psor looks like seamless constellations on my skin right now. It’s getting worse.

// It has been raining almost every day for the whole month and I’m really loving this kind of cold wet weather but unfortunately, it’s making my Psor itchy and dry. Really glad it is slowly healing though. Can’t wait to wear t-shirts in public again.

// I was really not a fan of anime until recently when I saw the movie, Kimi no Na wa. Yes, I remember I grew up watching animes on the local TV stations, but I never got to finish or follow the whole story and as a kid, it was really entertaining to watch. As I grew older, I started to dislike it. I thought it was childish, but that view changed over time. Now can I just say some anime movies/series are better than the live-action ones? It’s just that anime characters are much more expressive and it takes you somewhere that isn’t achievable in real life. Anyway, I also did lists of all the anime I’ve finished watching.

// It has been a month already since we moved to our new home. We’re still adjusting but everything seems okay. Or not? Haha. The expenses and the incoming bills make me want to cry.

// I just saw the four-part Netflix series, When They See Us. It’s about five Harlem teens wrongly accused of raping a jogger in 1989 in Central Park. Based on the true story. I had a hard time watching this. It was beautifully acted. It truly pains me what these young men and families were put through because of a corrupt and heartless system. Heart-wrenching series with a powerful message. A must-watch!

Books I’ve Finished Reading

Everything I Never Told You – Celeste Ng 4/5 ☆
I really liked it. The story was intriguing and I did actually feel what the characters were going through. It was messed-up and sad. Reading chapter after chapter was difficult. A great read though. Really engaging.

“People decide what you’re like before they even get to know you.”

A Spark Of Light – Jodi Picoult 2/5 ☆
It was okay. I started reading this December of last year and I finally decided to finish this first before moving on to a new book. Jodi Picoult is one of my favorite authors and I was really looking forward to reading this latest book of hers. I was pretty disappointed though. The story was dragging. The reverse chronology of the chapters and the multitudes of POVs of all the characters were really confusing. Took me a while to fully grasp the writing style and the characters. Anyway, I love that Jodi still tackles serious controversial issues. It was nice being able to understand both sides equally, whether you are pro-life or pro-choice. Would I recommend this book? Yes. Maybe you’ll like it!

“She had come to the clinic because she didn’t want to be a little girl anymore. But it wasn’t having sex that made you a woman. It was having to make decisions, sometimes terrible ones. Children were told what to do. Adults made up their own minds, even when the options tore them apart.”

Shout – Laurie Halse Anderson 3/5 ☆
I applaud Anderson for this book. An eye-opener. But gave 3 stars because I think it was all over the place. Cluttered. I can hardly understand some but there were few verses that I really loved. My favorite would be “Wired Together”.

“Don’t get raped
cuz the jackasses and idiots will say
that’s your fault, too.”

Aristotle and Dante Discover the Secrets of the Universe – Benjamin Alire Sáenz 5/5 ☆
What a beautiful book. It was well-written. A page-turner. I love all the characters. I really loved it. Exceptional. Did I already tell you how beautiful it was? Well, I just had to tell again and again. It was beautiful. A must-read!

“Sometimes, you do things and you do them not because you’re thinking but because you’re feeling. Because you’re feeling too much. And you can’t always control the things you do when you’re feeling too much.”